Push & Pull (The Midwest Series Book 2) Read online

  “Thanks.” Lowell took the sweating bottle from his hand. “And why would I do that?”

  “Well I am semi-famous,” Brent joked and took a bite of his hot dog. So good.

  Lowell’s mouth tightened. “I didn’t know if I was allowed to talk about the fact that we’re on this trip together.”

  Brent frowned. “Why wouldn’t you be?”

  Shrugging, Lowell looked away. “I wasn’t sure you wanted to admit you were spending the summer with a cock hungry twink like me.”

  “Oh fuck off,” Brent said around a mouthful of hot dog. He chewed and swallowed before he continued. “I’m sorry I called you that. And I’ll admit I avoided you when I was closeted, but I’m not ashamed of knowing you or afraid to admit we’re spending the summer together.”

  Lowell gave him a skeptical look. “Really? Because you’ve been acting like it.”

  “How about this? I’ll even friend you on Facebook and tag you in all of my pictures.” Brent shifted the hot dog to his left hand and dug his phone out of his pocket with his right. The water bottle he had tucked under his arm threatened to fall to the ground.

  “I wasn’t trying to make this a huge deal or anything,” Lowell said with a huff. He reached for the water bottle just as Brent was about to lose it.

  Annoyed at the whole thing, Brent found Lowell’s profile and added him as a friend. “There. I sent a request.”

  Lowell rolled his eyes, but a moment later, Brent’s phone buzzed with a notification saying he’d accepted the friend request. Brent alternated between eating his hot dog and editing his status message to say, Having a blast in Chicago—with Lowell Prescott.

  Okay, so maybe that was a little strange to see, even though he’d tagged Nathan in a thousand things before. Somehow, being out of the closet and connected to a guy like Lowell was a little weird, but whatever. So what if people thought they were fucking, right? He felt a weird lurch in his stomach, and he crammed the remainder of the hot dog in his mouth and tried to ignore it.

  Okay, maybe Lowell had a point earlier. Who was he trying to convince that he wasn’t an uptight asshole who was uncomfortable with a guy like Lowell: Lowell or himself?

  “Ready to keep walking?” Lowell asked, and Brent nodded, his mouth too full to speak. He jammed his phone in his pocket, then took his water bottle back.

  “Did you know next year will be the one hundredth anniversary of Navy Pier?” Lowell asked a few minutes later. “It was the only pier to combine shipping and public entertainment when it was built.”

  “No, I can’t say I knew that.” Brent shook his head and tossed his trash in the garbage can as they passed. “You know, you are pretty handy to have around. It’s kinda nice having my own personal tour guide.”

  Lowell gave him a dirty smile. “Trust me; I’m good for a lot more than that.”

  Brent rolled his eyes and flipped Lowell off.

  “Promises, promises,” Lowell teased, and Brent tried not to think about Lowell’s comment too closely. Or the fact that he was kind of enjoying this semi-antagonistic flirty banter they had going on.

  Chapter Six

  May 27, 2013 – Chicago, Illinois

  Lowell

  They spent the rest of the afternoon wandering Navy Pier and playing with the remote control boats. Brent seemed hesitant to have dinner at one of the restaurants there—Lowell assumed it was because they were so expensive—but Lowell talked him into going and letting him pay. The restaurants were touristy and overpriced, for sure, but a part of the Navy Pier experience that Lowell didn’t want him to miss. Brent put up a token fight, but once Lowell started to describe the food and beer, Brent gave in.

  “Thank you,” Brent said as they left the restaurant. He sounded sincere. “That was really good food, and I appreciate you springing for dinner.”

  “You’re welcome.” Lowell paused outside the doors. “So what’s next? Want to go on the Centennial Wheel now?”

  Brent craned his neck. He looked vaguely alarmed as he stared at it, and Lowell wondered if he had a fear of heights. At two hundred feet in the air, it was a seriously massive Ferris wheel. Though not the biggest in the world.

  “No big deal if you don’t want to go,” Lowell said casually. Now was not the time to get pushy. He’d done that enough on this trip already. It would give them a hell of a view of the city though, and if Brent could stomach it, it would be a memorable part of the trip.

  Brent cleared his throat. “Uh. Sure. Why not?”

  The lines were long, and they both played on their phones while they waited to buy their tickets. Lowell discovered he had a message from Caleb.

  Looks like things are improving with Brent.

  Yeah, it’s getting way less awkward, Lowell typed. He doesn’t look at me like he wants to light me on fire anymore.

  LOL. Just meant since he friended you and tagged you in the photos he took.

  Yeah, that was a little weird. I think he was trying to prove something, but whatever.

  Having fun though? Caleb asked.

  Yeah, I am. Always good to come home, especially when it doesn’t involve seeing my parents. How are things with Nathan?

  Stupid good. :) Thanks for switching with him. I can’t imagine having to spend the entire summer without him.

  When are you packing up and making the move to Chicago?

  Next week! It’s crazy.

  We’ll just miss you guys then, we leave this weekend.

  We? Do I sense some couple-ness happening?

  Lowell glared at his phone as if Caleb could see it. His fingers flew across his phone screen as he replied. Oh, fuck off. We’re on this trip together, but trust me, we are not a couple.

  I’m just saying a lot could happen in the next few months ...

  I’m going to pretend like you never said that. Lowell looked up and realized there was only one family in front of them in line. Gotta go. We’re about to get on the Centennial Wheel.

  He stuffed his phone in his pocket before he could read Caleb’s answer. When they reached the front of the line, Brent grabbed for his wallet, but Lowell cut him off. “Two adult tickets, please. Illinois state resident,” he said as he slid his driver’s license across the counter.

  He had the tickets in his hand before Brent could open his mouth to argue. “Um, thanks,” he said as he took the one Lowell offered him.

  “No problem.” Lowell smiled at him. “It’s cheaper for me with the in-state discount.”

  “Yeah, I appreciate it.” A flicker of something crossed Brent’s face, and Lowell wondered if the money thing was bugging him. That was so hard to navigate with some people. “That was nice of you.”

  Lowell shrugged. “If we’re on this trip together, we might as well make each other’s lives easier. Besides, you’d already paid for the Shedd tickets.”

  Brent didn’t reply as they got in line to get on the Centennial Wheel. It moved steadily forward and Brent craned his neck a couple of times as if he were wondering what he’d gotten himself into. But, eventually, they were ushered into a glass-enclosed gondola. Brent took a seat at the far end of the bench, and Lowell settled next to him. Strangers crowded in and soon they were squashed together, Brent’s broad shoulders encroaching into Lowell’s space. Lowell tried to fold in on himself and take up a little less room, but the person on his other side shifted to fill the spot.

  “Mind if I ...” Brent shifted to the side and lifted his arm.

  “Sure, no problem.” The doors to the gondola closed.

  Brent’s arm was warm and heavy as he settled it around Lowell’s shoulders. Lowell’s stomach tumbled, and he tried to convince himself it was because the wheel had begun to rise and not because of Brent’s proximity. He didn’t do cuddling. And yet, as he pointed out various landmarks to Brent, Lowell realized he was finding excuses to lean in closer. When the person next to him shifted, he did too, pressing closer to Brent.

  At this proximity, he could smell Brent’s body wash or cologne.
It was woodsy and masculine, exactly what the kind of guy who planned camping and hiking trips would wear. And, damn it, Brent made it smell good.

  The wheel itself was lit, but the interior of the gondola was dark, and despite the other people crowded around them, it felt oddly intimate, the way they were pressed together.

  Lowell pointed to the far right, trying to distract himself by playing the tour guide. “That’s the John Hancock Tower. The short, lighter-colored building along the waterfront belongs to Northwestern University, and then there’s Lakeshore Place, and The W Hotel—fabulous place to stay, by the way—straight ahead is Lake Point Towers, and a little to the left is North Pier Apartments.”

  “Can you imagine waking up every morning and seeing the lake like that?”

  “I can,” Lowell said. “But it definitely comes at a premium.” Too rich for his blood even.

  “I’m sure.”

  “The tall white skyscraper is Trump Tower. Farther left, the really blocky white building is the Aon Center, and then the tall dark one is technically Willis Tower but everyone still calls it the Sears Tower.”

  “Cool.” Brent smiled at him. “Thanks for the guided tour.”

  “I thought you might find it interesting. Chicago has a pretty spectacular skyline at night, I think.”

  “Yeah. This was a great idea,” Brent said quietly. “I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel about the height, but it doesn’t seem bad at all inside the gondola, and the view is amazing.”

  “It’s actually one of my favorite touristy things in Chicago,” Lowell said.

  “I totally get why.”

  “Did you know the original wheel originated in Chicago during the World’s Fair in 1893?”

  “I can’t say I did.” A little smile curled up the corners of Brent’s lips.

  Lowell felt a funny lurch in his stomach at the sight. Goddamn it, this was starting to get weird. And yet, the really weird part was that it didn’t feel weird. It felt totally normal to be out with Brent like this. It felt, well, almost like a date.

  Goddamn you, Caleb, for putting thoughts of coupledom in my head, he thought. I could strangle you right now.

  Lowell would never admit it aloud—at least to anyone but Caleb, who knew him better than any other human on the planet—but he’d never actually been on a date before. Obviously, this wasn’t a date, but it was the sort of thing he’d want to do if he ever went on one.

  He glanced over at Brent, taking in his profile silhouetted against the brightly lit Chicago skyline. Lowell’s gaze traced down from Brent’s thick hair, over his sculpted nose, full lips, and strong jaw.

  As if aware of his scrutiny, Brent turned and looked at him. He smiled then. Not the little half-smile he’d had before, but a big, full one that really made Lowell’s stomach flip. Brent brushed his thumb against Lowell’s shoulder. Rather than make Lowell want to pull away, it relaxed him, and he settled a little more closely against Brent. It felt nice.

  Obviously, this wasn’t a date. But if it was, this version of Brent was the type of guy Lowell wouldn’t mind having it with.

  May 27, 2013 – Chicago, Illinois

  Brent

  That was really nice, Brent thought as they exited the gondola.

  Heights had never been his thing, but he hadn’t wanted to admit that to Lowell. And, amazingly, it hadn’t bothered him at all. Maybe it was because it was an enclosed space, or maybe it had just been Lowell providing a distraction. The prickly side of Lowell had been replaced by something a little softer. And Brent had liked it. A lot.

  The teenage girl sitting across from them had given him a small smile when he draped an arm around Lowell. He’d hesitated before he did it, afraid even asking Lowell would piss him off. Even though Lowell said yes, he seemed a little stiff at first, but eventually, he’d relaxed against Brent and continued to point out attractions in the area.

  But even more than annoying Lowell, Brent had worried about what the people around them would think. He was normally so hyper-aware of everything he did that could be interpreted as gay that he was still second-guessing everything he did.

  It was a little startling to realize he didn’t have to hide anymore. Most of the people around them hadn’t paid them any attention. The one person who did seem to notice them gave them a smile like they were cute. It totally blew his mind. Sometimes, it felt like he had to re-think the way he reacted to everything now. It was fucking weird to be living as an out guy after so many years of being closeted.

  Lowell lightly touched his shoulder, and Brent snapped out of the trance he’d been in. “So, what do you want to do tonight?” Lowell asked as they walked down the steps to the lower section of Navy Pier.

  “I dunno. Maybe we could—” The ringing of Lowell’s phone interrupted him.

  “Sorry.” Lowell gave him an offhanded smile and reached in his pocket for his phone. The smile fell when he glanced at the screen. “Give me a minute.”

  He turned away at the foot of the stairs, and Brent saw his shoulders rise and fall with a huge breath before he brought the phone to his ear. “Hello.” He was silent for a moment. “Yes, I’m in Chicago, and I need Cubs tickets for myself and a friend on Friday. That’s what I said in the email I sent you.” Brent tried not to listen too closely, but the tightness in Lowell’s voice made him curious. Who had he called?

  “Why can’t I pick up the tickets at the box office?” Lowell’s voice rose a little, and he glanced over his shoulder at Brent, who hastily looked away, pretending to stare out over the water. Lowell walked a few feet away from Brent and was silent for a minute. When Brent glanced back at him, he had a scowl on his face, and his foot tapped impatiently.

  “See me? Well, it’s not my fault you couldn’t make it to my graduation!” Lowell snarled. “I was there, and Kalamazoo is only a few hours’ drive.”

  “Fine! When do you want me there?” Lowell paused. “Ugh, dinner? Do I have to?” He turned back to Brent and made a face. Brent had given up on pretending like he wasn’t listening to Lowell’s half of the conversation. “Caleb is my roommate, Mom. You’d think you could get it right. I only lived with the guy for four years. But that’s not who I’m in Chicago with. It’s actually Caleb’s boyfriend’s roommate, Brent.” Sighing, Lowell rolled his eyes at Brent. “I’ll ask him.”

  Lowell held his phone against his chest. “Before my parents will turn over the Cubs tickets, my mom is demanding I come to dinner, and she’s somehow roped you into this. You don’t have to go, but I promised I’d ask.”

  “Whatever. I’ll do anything for Cubs tickets.” Brent shrugged, still trying to reconcile the fact that it was Lowell’s mom on the other end of the line. He was pretty sure if he’d ever talked that way to his mom, she would have grounded him. No matter how old he was.

  “Remember that tomorrow when you meet them and regret ever agreeing to it.” Lowell sighed. “Okay, I’ll tell her we’re both coming.”

  He turned away and lifted the phone to his ear again. “Brent and I will be there. What time is dinner?”

  Brent leaned his elbows on the railing and looked out over the black water, glittering with reflected light from the Chicago skyline. It didn’t sound like Lowell got along very well with his family. Brent couldn’t imagine that. Sure, he’d had arguments with his parents over the years, but they were nothing major. And the Cameron family was pretty close now.

  His parents had both been great when he came out to them in high school. His mom had been sad for him when he told her he planned to stay in the closet because of his college hockey career, but she’d been supportive. His dad was the one he called every time the pressure to stay in the closet got to be too much. And although his siblings drove him a little nuts sometimes, at the end of the day, Brent always knew his whole family had his back. It was sad to think Lowell didn’t have that.

  Brent felt the brush of Lowell’s shoulder against his as he leaned on the railing next to him. Brent glanced over to see that he was off t
he phone now. “Everything okay?”

  Lowell smiled at him, but it looked more forced than sincere. “It’s fine.”

  “You sure? If it’s too much of a pain, we can skip it,” he offered. “If you don’t get along with your family and that’s the only way we can get the tickets, it’s totally not worth it.”

  Turning to face him, Lowell reached out and squeezed his upper arm. “You’re sweet. No, it’ll be fine. My parents drive me kind of crazy, but we all love each other in our own way. I’m just being an overdramatic queen. It’ll be fine. I promise.”

  “You want to talk about it?” Brent offered tentatively.

  “No.”

  Brent nodded. He had no idea what else to say. “Um, so what do you want to do now?” he asked after an uncomfortably long silence.

  “Well, what do you say we go to the hotel, change into something more bar appropriate, and go out for a drink or two? The night is still young, and I promised I’d show you more of Boystown.” He smiled at Brent, but his eyes still looked sad.

  “Sure,” Brent agreed. But as they walked to the bus station, he kept sneaking glances at Lowell, wondering if he’d made a mistake agreeing to have dinner with Lowell’s family. Was their relationship really that bad? Did Brent really want to end up in the middle of it?

  He felt guilty canceling now that he’d given his word though.

  And it was just dinner. How terrible could it really be?

  Chapter Seven

  May 27, 2013 – Chicago, Illinois

  Lowell

  The dim lights near the bar half-lit Brent’s face as he sipped his second beer, emphasizing his strong chin and full lower lip. Lowell had downed two mixed drinks in quick succession, and he was starting to regret it. After four years of college, he’d come to the conclusion that there were three kinds of drunks. Mean drunks and sad drunks were really annoying. Lowell was a horny drunk, which was a marginal improvement. Better than being the guy who started fights or cried in the corner, but it meant that once his head started to swim, he’d been unable to take his eyes off Brent.